From the moment I woke up I could tell it was going to be one of those days where I don’t care to do one thing on my list. Well, maybe the drink water thing, but today is clearly telling me, “Relax, find a comfy spot on the couch, watch TV, knit”.
So, the question for today is:
* Do I plow through and get things done or do I listen to these inner thoughts and find a nice comfy spot on the couch?
I’m sure the reality will be a little bit of both. It is Friday after all.
In between waiting for a load of laundry to stop spinning and before I run off to scrub the shower (cause those things don’t magically take care of themselves, apparently) I thought I would discuss a small personality flaw of mine.
I know, it looks like a pile of magazines, but what you’re actually looking at is a compulsive behavior. Growing up it was unicorns, stickers, and such. As an adult it’s been Barbies, Beanie Babies (embarrassing, but true), and crafting supplies which has ranged from patterns to yarn and everything in between. I’ve mostly broken out of this need to have more and more and more of something, but for some reason my current obsession seems to be these lovely glossy periodicals.
This is not all of them, but only the unread ones and this doesn’t even include my digital subscriptions… in my defense, sort of, I no longer have any physical subscriptions, but when I pass by a wall of magazines like this my heart races a little and I might break into a bit of a sweat. It’s almost like I’m gazing on a wall of potential, but we all know that’s not really how it works.
So now I’ve placed myself on a strict moratorium of absolutely no magazines until we get packed up and move to our new place. That’s a month and half. Totally doable, but that means I have to figure out a way to buy groceries without passing this wall of temptation…
The lazy blogger has struck again… and I have so much to talk about!
I don’t think I’ve mentioned it here, but we have been house hunting the past few months. And by that I mean we have spent almost every Saturday and Sunday traipsing around to various open houses looking and analyzing every detail of any home that fits our very specific criteria. It’s a mess out there people. I don’t know how many of you are privy to the ways of the San Francisco housing market, but it’s crazy town. The list price? A mere suggestion. Cash buyers? More than you would think possible. It’s been a bit daunting.
The good part though, is that we were not in any particular hurry, so being outbid by unseemly amounts wasn’t a huge deal. The great part is that last Tuesday we put in an offer for a place we really really liked. And we got it! Not without some good old fashioned trials and tribulations, but we are currently in escrow and crossing our fingers that the rest of the process goes off without a hitch. Even sitting here writing this a week later I’m still a bit in shock that we’re this close and I’m so super excited!
Part of the reason it was a little crazy making is that we had to sign all the docs and get our escrow account up and running on Wednesday (we accepted their counter offer that morning) cause we were leaving for New York City Thursday morning. Our timing is nothing if not impeccable.
Oh, and our trip to NYC? A-ma-zing*! Mike and Emily flew up to meet us and were able to meet up with several friends who live there now. It was really nice to spend a weekend walking the city, eating amazing* food with amazing* drinks, all in the company of great friends.
Good times, people, good times.
* just for you Mike…
Good morning world! Or really, almost noon, but hey it’s my blog, right? And yes, since it’s my blog I can use a thousand commas and start sentences with and… but I digress.
Today is my birthday and I thought I would say a quick hello to everyone out there and talk a little about my annual birthday angst.
I have this weird relationship with my birthday where I don’t want to make a big deal of it, but I kinda want it to be a big deal. And I don’t really care if people know my age, but yeah, I kinda do care. Can you tell what kind of morning it’s been so far? It’s been a morning of contemplation dashed with a smidge of serious reflection and what do I have to show for it. Not much except for plans to make myself a better me. Not sure what that means, but there it is.
So here is to another year of living my life in my own personal crazy making sort of way and allowing myself to not take myself so seriously. Maybe let go of some of those internal rules that I create for myself that add to my neurosis. We’ll see.
Speaking of rules… I do want to add one though (I know, I know). A good one. I want to write here at least once a week. About anything. I enjoy putting my rambling thoughts down in a semi-cohesive sense, but what scares me is putting them out for the world to see. Nothing like a little healthy fear to get the blood pumping.
So no rules on what the content will be. It could be knitting. It could be navel gazing. It could be about my need to rearrange the cutlery when I’m at a restaurant. It could be about how I am never quite sure how to end a post…
Monday morning, at yoga, our instructor spoke about going about our daily activities from a place of love and not guilt. This really struck a chord with me. The reason? Every morning I sit down and write a to do list and every day I look at that list and then swiftly begin the process of procrastinating. Now mind you, most of these items aren’t difficult. Some may take time and some effort, but generally they’re not what you would think of as difficult items. Yet, I procrastinate and the more I procrastinate the guiltier I feel and then I procrastinate even more and then I feel like an ass for not getting stuff done.
So. Yeah. Not really helpful in feeling good about what one has accomplished for the day. I may be getting things done, but my brain puts up such a fight that it’s kinda exhausting. I just feel, well, over it. So here’s what I’m doing. I’m reminding myself why the item needs to be done. I know, sounds silly, but when I look at my to do list and I see wash dishes I’m changing that internal monologue from ‘I really should get this done before Joe* gets home cause the kitchen looks like crap’ to ‘I’m going to feel really good when this is done and the kitchen will look great without all the clutter’.
The other thing I realized while contemplating all of this is that I’ve been placing rules around things that I enjoy so that I’ll do them. Let me say that again, I’ve placed rules around things I enjoy so that I’ll do them. Is it just me or does that make zero sense? On that note there will be no more crafty Friday or whatever Tuesday posts. Clearly none of that was working and it just created guilt around something that I initially started because I love to write.
So instead of guilting my way through the day with all the should’s that hang out in my crazy brain I’m going to think about why I’m really doing them and work to turn my mind over to the joy of it… even for things as mundane as washing dishes.
What do you guys think? Are you living your life from a place of guilt or love? Also, while flitting around the internet I found this post about guilt that I really enjoyed.
* To be clear, Joe is not nagging me about things undone. This is all in the fabulous world of negative talk that goes on in my head.
Good Morning 2013
I’m sitting here at my kitchen table, drinking a fresh cup of coffee, and watching The Rose Parade. It’s a good morning. It’s a morning that feels fresh with promise.
This year I’m going to focus on well, focus. When I make a decision to do something, whether it be to pick up the living room or learn something new, I need to focus. I find that I’m easily distracted or discouraged and that needs to be minimized. This year I have some fun and exciting things that I want to get into and success is going to rely on focus. I’ll need that impetus to push me forward into sticking with them once I start.
To that end I’ll be spending time every morning practicing meditation and also asking myself why I’m not moving forward. I guess that means their will be some self-reflection mixed in with that focus.
So here is to a great 2013 and I wish everyone happiness and success in all your endeavors.
What do you have in store for 2013?
What does a popular girl like me do on a Friday night? Why, go see the infamous (her word) Jenny Lawson read a chapter of her new book, Let’s Pretend This Never Happened. And it was totally worth it!
She brought a few of her friends with her… It was tough not to give that little guy a hug, except for the part where I thought he might gnaw on my face.
I’m not even sure what to say. I know, me unable to use or find words about something? How about super fantastic? Well, it will have to do, but it doesn’t do her justice. Not even close.
Here’s Joe and I with Jenny.
While she was signing my book Joe dominated the conversation with Chad Vader. I can’t take him anywhere…
I only have one regret tonight and that’s not getting the name of the woman sitting next to me. I love coming to something like this and meeting amazing people and I did that… and then I didn’t even ask here the name of her blog. Blurgh!
edited to add: totally forgot to add a link to Chad Vader… your welcome
I’ve been neglecting my podcasts of late and over the past few days have been playing catch up like a mad woman. One of my faves is the Joy the Baker Podcast with Joy and Tracy (@ shutterbean.com). So on episode 43 they asked us listeners to post five of our favorite things on our blog. Awesome! Cause I was going to tell you about my crappy eating habits today and this is so much more interesting…
So, in no particular order, these are five of my favorite things, RIGHT NOW:
1) Estee Lauder’s Praline Paradise Shimmer. Run don’t walk to the store and buy this. I’ve never been that person that uses an entire tube of anything and I’m on like tube 12 of this stuff. Go get yourself some.
2 & 3) Joe, my husband of 15 years and my best friend (bonus!) and my little dog too… that would be Leeloo. Extra points if you know the movie reference.
4) So my parents stopped by this past weekend on their way back from Hawaii and dropped off these little gems. I present to you Pineapple Snow or as they’re known around here, crack in a box.
I know, they look boring and stuff, but they are full of amazing! White chocolate with macadamia nuts and infused with pineapple wine. If you find yourself in Hawaii you must find them. Here’s the box top for reference.
5) Blanton’s Original Single Barrel Bourbon Whiskey in a glass with a couple cubes of ice. Perfect way to end a hard day at work and a blog post…
I would have photographed this in a glass with the cubes of ice, but yoga beckons and I’m thinking pre-drinking may not be the best idea.
Thanks to Joy and Tracy for so much entertainment and real talk. Muah!
So last night I get home from work and my back was feeling like crap again so I decided to forgo my illustrious to do list and just hang out for the evening. It was nice. I sat on the couch with Leeloo, a martini, some knitting, and some old Law & Order. I’ve been working on this scarf, Laetiporus, and may actually get it finished here in the next few weeks. It’s crazy long and I may have to dub it the Dr. Who scarf since it’s already way taller than I am (which is not really saying much…).
Later I got a text from Joe that he was heading to the gym and wouldn’t be home till later. Well, I decided that I should have some dinner ready when he gets home. That means I was going to fix some delish local ravioli that I topped off with some olive oil heated up with parsley, red pepper flakes, and garlic. Oh my! It was perfect! Yeah, I know that doesn’t sound so amazing, but my cooking skills are not all that, so for this to turn out so well was a huge bonus. It was so good that I decided to leave all the dirty dishes for today. Maybe not my best idea, but it felt like it at the time. Ha!
So now the dishes are clean and I’ve got to run upstairs and scrub a few bathroom sinks before I run out to meet some friends for the evening. My parents will be in this weekend so I feel like this place needs to sparkle!